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A Day in the Life of Doctor Mew

By July 26, 2016 Uncategorized

7:30AM After an entire night of being free to roam around where I pleased, the people started coming back in again. I’d complain, but they’re the only ones who I know of that can provide me with “The Food”.

It’s in a bin up on a high shelf that I cannot reach in any other way. It is also inside a container that I cannot open. Yet another way they mock me for my lack of thumbs.

I was fed, and it was delicious. I will wait a short while before I start crying again.

7:45AM Most of the people are suckers when they first arrive in the morning. They don’t all come in at the same time, so I can pretend like I haven’t received any food. Today, I was even more vocal because breakfast was 3 kibbles short. The red haired one fell for it. Again.

8:00AM Still more people arriving, but nobody wants to give me more food. Reluctantly, I allow myself to be picked up. Nothing! I feel cheated that my fur was messed up, and I didn’t even get more food. I shall now attempt to remove the human stink from my precious coat.

8:07AM Someone walked within 10 feet of my bowl. They were just getting a towel from the shelf. I plan on sitting here looking sad and hungry for another 20 minutes.

8:27AM I heard the click of the my heated bed. I jumped up and had about 3 minutes of uninterrupted warmth. Then someone came in, shooed me away, and grumbled as they had to clean the table again. Something about this is their surgery table. Cold… So very cold…

8:48AM After wandering around, I figured second best is the sun in the window. It’s cloudy today. I hate Mondays…

9:05AM Now’s the fun time when other animals start arriving. It would be fun to hang out with Wizard, but he’s scared of too many things. He usually runs away when cars drive by on the road. So now I get to see some dogs. I can smell the cats, but not always see them. Sticking my paws under the door, hopefully somebody will be enticed to shake.

9:20AM Leashes are fun. There’s a bunch hanging on the wall. I had a big feathery toy that was slightly more fun, but I already tore that apart. I’ll just stick to the leashes.

9:41AM Sitting in a box.

9:46AM Sitting in a different box

9:58AM Sitting in yet another box. And now I’m trapped… Hopefully someone will save me before I starve.

10:06AM Turned out that box was open on the other side. I wasn’t paying attention well enough. It must be hunger hallucinations, after all it is only two hours until lunch.
10:23AM Somebody was having a snack and ridiculously left it out on their desk, unattended. It beckoned to me, and I drooled a bit. I had to nibble all over the end. When they returned, they sighed and threw it in the garbage! Why! I was eating it!

10:38AM The copy machine was being used, and got nice and warm. I jumped up on it and accidentally made a copy of my butt. I’m so embarrassed. I look good though.

10:54AM The sink is interesting. Everyone looks at me weird when I sit in it. However, they will occasionally rinse out food bowls and the drain can have tiny crumbs of delicious, delicious food. If I eat them though, I get pulled out of the sink.

11:00AM I don’t think I’ll be able to make it much longer. The hunger is getting to me. Must.. conserve… energy… HOLY COW, IT’S A PIECE OF PAPER!!!

11:13AM After chasing the paper around for a good deal of time, I got my second wind. I will now sing the song of my people in order to make the kibble appear in my bowl.

11:17AM Nobody is listening.

11:18AM Someone responded to my cries! Oh joy! However, all they did was pick me up and give me hugs. I am not happy. I only enjoy the kind of physical contact that results in food. I will tolerate this, but mostly because I might get fed.
11:58AM Biding my time, and I got wonderful, wonderful food again! I love everyone! I want attention! I WANT TO PLAY! This feeling will last forever!

12:00PM I’m starving.

12:25PM Everyone else is eating their own delicious food and I have nothing left. Oh the felinity! Bunch of jerks.

12:55PM To add insult to injury, they are not giving me more food, but rather brushing my teeth! I was saving the small morsels of kibble between my teeth in case of emergency. Now they are gone!

1:13PM A carrier! They are so fun! Must enter!

1:16PM Still in the carrier.

1:18PM No one will ever find me!!!!! Great place for a nap…

1:20PM I got removed from the carrier with a lot of grumbles from them, because now they have to clean it out. I’m not dirty! Geez! Just because it wasn’t my carrier…

1:45PM What is this mysterious land of paper and pens and paper clips… Oh, it’s the counter. I forgot, because I always get shooed down. But that mouse pad looks pretty inviting. I think that later I’ll leave a furball on it. Seems like a good place.
2:05PM Lovely cat tree. You are the best. I will lie on you forever… or until something more interesting happens.

2:15PM What’s this flaky plant stuff someone gave me? Is it food? No… OH catnip! So good! So very excite! Much play.

2:25PM Needed to lie down in my bed. Can’t believe I ate all of that nip, man. Ugh! I swear, I will never do this again, as long as I live… And this time I mean it.

2:27PM Oh hey look! Catnip! Nom nom nom

2:45PM My bed is pretty nice. Love to stay… Hey! Why’d you close my door! I’m trapped! Let me out! There’s a big dog right there! I want to see him! He’s barking at me! He obviously wants to hang out with me.

2:58PM Well, the dog is gone now, but they let me out. I took a drink of water to prep my voice to start crying for dinner in a bit.

3:00PM Started crying for dinner. They picked me up for a hug, and told me it wasn’t for another 2 hours. Clocks are not as accurate as my stomach.

3:05PM The pangs of hunger are too strong. My will is weakened. I will have to do the unthinkable. Do a trick for a treat.


3:18PM Giving up on asking for dinner, I tried to sneak my paws through the cage doors for Calle. She’s a slow eater, and pretty quiet, so she’s none the wiser when I’m stealing her food.

3:22PM They moved Calle’s bowl further away from the door so I can’t reach it. Now I’ll surely starve.

4:03PM I’m bored. Now seems like an excellent time to see how many humans I can trip. Let’s see if I can beat my high score of 6.

4:10PM I failed at my mission. The blonde one stepped on my tail. Rude.

4:16PM My tummy is grumbling. Must be second lunch time. Not too long until dinnertime, so I’ve got to get eating! Nobody is listening to me though. Fading fast…


4:40PM I got my dinner delivered early! Suckers! I knew asking over and over again would work. I own them.

5:15PM They’re starting to clean. Must be almost time for everyone to leave.

5:25PM Jumped up onto a doctor’s lap for some end of day scratches. I guess she forgave me for eating her sandwich.

5:26PM Done, and jumped over to another doctor. He wasn’t paying attention. I placed my behind in his face to remind him I need petting. He obeyed.

5:27PM Done, and now to snuggle in the blanket under the printer table. Dreaming of food…

6:30PM Whoa! I guess I over napped! Everyone is gone? Perfect! Now I get to run around all over the place.

6:35PM Wonder when breakfast is?

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